God loved King David. He called him a ‘man after His own heart’ (1 Sam. 13:14). Jehovah established his throne and united Israel under his rule. Furthermore, He granted David an eternal dynasty:
“…the LORD declares that he will make a house for you – a dynasty of kings!…Your house and your kingdom will continue before me for all time, and your throne will be secure forever.” 2 Sam. 7:11 & 16. NLT
There is no physical house / throne that will last forever. God is referring to the eternal kingdom of Jesus Christ, whose earthly body will be birthed from the lineage of King David. The favor of God continued to follow him…
Outside of Jesus however, there is no one who is above falling down. On a warm spring evening, King David decided to cool off on his rooftop, (He was married to Saul’s daughter at this time). Looking out over the rooftops, he sees a beautiful woman bathing on hers.
Filled with lust, he has her (who is also married) brought to him for an adulterous tryst. The woman, Bathsheba, was subsequently impregnated. King David had her soldier husband sent to the front lines of battle, whereupon David knew that he would lose his life. Then, he married Bathsheba – definitely a wrong relationship. This did not get by Jehovah:
But the thing that David had done [with Bathsheba] was evil in the sight of the LORD. 2 Sam. 11:27 AMP
God then sent his prophet Nathan, to let David know his deed is known, and to deliver His penalty. Nathan said that David’s house would be troubled for the remainder of his days and that the deed he had hoped to keep secret, would be played out in public.
(Indeed, David and Bathsheba’s first child was taken by sickness – leading to death. One of his subsequent sons rapes his half-sister, and the half-sister’s brother takes the rapist’s life in vengeance. That same son publicly commits adultery with one of King David’s wives, and also lays a plot to kill his father, but dies himself in the attempt.)
King David confesses and repents, and God forgives him…
Obviously, adultery is injurious (not to mention murder, in David’s case) to relationships. God gave us guidelines for having right relationships; and anything outside of those standards must be considered wrong relationships.
Let’s begin by examining how to have our first conscious right relationship – the one with our parents:
“Honor (respect, obey, care for) your father and your mother, so that your days may be prolonged in the land that the LORD your God gives you.” Ex. 20:12 AMP
This is the fifth of the Ten Commandments and is the only one of them that offers you a blessing of long life when you obey it.
God also has designs for the right relationship of marriage. After all, He invented it:
“Therefore, a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” Mk. 10:7 – 9. ESV
…among the Lord’s people, women are not independent of men, and men are not independent of women. For although the first woman came from man, every other man was born of a woman, and everything comes from God. 1 Cor. 11:11, 12. NLT
Thus, we see that marriage is between a man and a woman; and with the exception of unrepentant adultery, abuse, or abandonment, it is meant to be a life-long relationship of equality and interdependence.
“…marriage is a gift from God- it is a gift that God bestows on human beings as His servants – and secondly, that marriage is for God – it is a gift to be used for God’s service and the service of His kingdom.” William J.U. Philip: Aspects of Love
The husband is blessed from God through his wife:
A virtuous and excellent wife [worthy of honor] is the crown of her husband… Pr. 12:4 AMP
He who finds a [true and faithful] wife finds a good thing and obtains favor and approval from the Lord. Pr. 18:22 AMP
Who can find a virtuous and capable wife? She is more precious than rubies. Her husband can trust her, and she will greatly enrich his life. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. Pr. 31:10 – 12. NLT
Both the husband and wife have a heavenly mandate to live together interdependently, but with distinct established roles:
Wives be subject to your husbands [out of respect for their position as protector, and their accountability to God], as is proper and fitting in the Lord. Husbands love your wives [with an affectionate, sympathetic, selfless love that always seeks the best for them] and do not be embittered or resentful toward them [because of the responsibilities of marriage]. Col. 3:18, 19. AMP
What then about how the marriage serves the kingdom of God?
And did not God make [you and your wife] one [flesh]? Did not One make you and preserve your spirit alive? And why [did God make you two] one? Because He sought godly offspring [from your union]. Therefore take heed to yourselves and let no one deal treacherously and be faithless to the wife of his youth. Mal. 2:15 AMPC
This is a two-fold command: to have children, and to keep the marriage solvent. The children are to cover the earth, to fill God’s paradise, to be a good steward of it, to be a blessing to their family, to become children of God, and to repeat the cycle.
Your wife will be like a fruitful grapevine, flourishing within your home. Your children will be like vigorous young olive trees as they sit around your table. That is the LORD’s blessing for those who fear (revere) him. Ps. 128:3, 4. NLT
Behold, children are a gift from the LORD, the fruit of the womb is a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, so are the children of one’s youth. How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them… Ps. 127:3 – 5. NASB
Like any other blessing from God, the responsibility of good stewardship accompanies raising children:
Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it. Pr. 22:6 NLT
For he issued his laws to Jacob; he gave his instructions to Israel. He commanded our ancestors to teach them to their children, so the next generation might know them – even the children not yet born – and they in turn will teach their own children. So each generation should set its hope anew on God, not forgetting his glorious miracles and obeying his commands. Ps. 78:5 – 7. NLT
Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger [do not exasperate them to the point of resentment with demands that are trivial or unreasonable or humiliating or abusive; nor by showing favoritism or indifference to any of them], but bring them up [tenderly with lovingkindness] in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. Eph. 6:4 AMP
Our mandate as Christians, is to teach our children about God, who He is, what He’s done through Christ, what He is still doing, and how they must behave to secure their heavenly hope, as well as spreading the gospel to their own children.
You see that God has singled out the fathers in the third scripture. This is not to diminish the mother’s influence in their children’s upbringing, but to point to the father’s tendency to be sterner in their discipline.
However, the family doesn’t flourish unless the marriage flourishes. More to come…
Goodnight and God bless.